Tell Me About Your Fears.

Fears will be the death of everyone. There is absolutely no need to be stressed and anxious all the time. I literally fear everything. Dramatic, I know., but it’s true. I’m afraid of flying, making decisions, making the wrong decision, not trying hard enough, trying too hard, not being good enough, so many more other things. With how social media is turning now, it makes this worse. It spikes so many questions… “Am I pretty enough, do I need to wear more makeup? Should I show more skin, or just wear tighter clothes? Is that what guys like and want? I need to work out more and eat less, is that what works? Why does everything good happen to them? Why can’t my life be like theres? I wish I have their job.” Which all of these are terrible questions. Your self worth isn’t measured by someone else’s, and what they’re comfortable with. What I always have to tell myself is what kind of attention those things draw. I don’t want that attention, the comments (good and bad), nor people staring at me/noticing me. Sure someone who wears all that makeup or shows a lot of skin/wears tight clothes gets noticed, and they might/could probably even like and want that. It’s not what I want, and most of the time it’s not positive attention, in the sense that no one sees her actual face or sees her for the person she is. It is very much like wearing a costume. You become attached to that and think that you have to look like that or dress like that to be noticed and liked. It is all a faux-sad. What’s left when you get past that? Sure they’re beautiful girls and women, but after the excitement of that and the newness wears off, the person is what’s left. That’s the same thing with fears. You fear this one thing that happens, stress over it, become anxious over it, and then it happens; how does that impact you? Was it as worse as you thought, is it the end of the world? No. You can’t control it. You can’t control how people view you, but you can control how you present yourself to them. Is the dirty look someone walking by you on the street gonna impact your life next week? Will you even remember it, will they? No. It does not matter in the long run, and the time spent worrying and fretting over it only makes you miss out on the present, which are the things you’ll remember tomorrow or next week- things that actually matter and impact your life for the better. The point is fears are totally and completely normal, in fact without them the world would be very scary, but you can’t let them take over your life. You can’t say you fear something and be unwilling to do anything about it, and expect to get past it or fix any problems. I fear doing terrible on exams, does that mean I ignore them and don’t take them? No. I study (most the time) for them and do what I can to ease that fear. I won’t ever get over the fear, because exams in school turn into meetings/projects/applying for jobs outside of school. The fear stays with you, but it adapts to other things with what is going on with your life. This is why doing things to help ease it or prepare for it, instead of ignoring or stubbornness, are vital to a healthy life.  And if I don’t study or do anything to prepare for the exam, I recognize and accept the fact that I have no right to complain or be upset at the grade I get. All of this is easy said than done, and I am nowhere near good at this. It’s a trial and error process that you do your whole life, but doing this definitely helps you to have a happier and more enjoyable life. Life is full of ups and downs, but there is always good happening; it’s your choice to embrace it.